Monday, February 22, 2016

I just don't understand.

(Not to be confused with things parents just don't understand).

People throw out "terms" at the drop of a hat these days. And with the endless "urban dictionary" (thanks a lot for encouraging teenagers..... asshole) at our disposal it's near impossible not to hear or even be referred to as one of these "phrases."

Case in point: "You're my Ride or Die girl." (They use the term "chick" as in- "you my ride or die chick" but I just can't bring myself to go with that).

Urban Dictionary Definition: A girl who is down for her man in any situation; a girl who's not afraid of throwin down side by side with her man, even if she's the only female; she's the girl who rides in tha passenger seat with the heat ready on her lap and knows all the targets.

Umm..... What?! First of all, is it really that hard to put a "g" on the end of throwin and do we really need to say "tha" instead of "the"? Come on guys, you're killing me!!

Aside from that I still have the question of- What?!! Is this like a "Bonnie and Clyde" type of thing? Is that how it's supposed to go and feel? If that's the case, doesn't anybody remember how that story ended? In case they haven't I would like to point out that Bonnie got flowers at the end of that roadtrip, but only because they matched her tombstone. Is that how we measure love these days? Geesh. Tough crowd.

I ask this question, because two guys that I used to work with have called me their "ride or die girl" on more than one occasion. I let it go the first couple of times, but now it's just kind of nagging at me, because it's confusing.

First off, I'm pretty sure that being someone's "ride or die girl" means that you aren't in fact some other guy's "ride or die girl" to. I may be wrong on this one, but I'm pretty confident in my logic at this point. I mean, it wasn't "Riding like Bonnie and Clyde..... and THAT OTHER GUY". Was it? I think not. So, how do you pick which one to go with?

On one hand dude could teach me how to land after jumping out of an airplane/ helicopter and smoke a side of beef, BUT, the could teach me how to survive prison and make distilled liquor out of toilet water. Decisions, decisions.

And if you're someone's "ride or die girl" doesn't that somehow imply that you guys are romantically involved? I feel like it's implied. And if that's how it is, then I'm not either for, well, either. I've never dated either of the two, we're just simply friends. Can it go like that? If not, then that opens up a whole other area that I don't want to get into, because I'm already confused enough as it is.

I don't know. All I do know is I would totally be Boyd Crowder's "ride or die girl" at the drop of a hat. And sorry guys, but neither of you are Boyd Crowder. I guess we'll call it even..... or I could just not tell either and still be both without having to actually make decisions and see where that gets me. I'm so confused.

I guess my only other question (since I'm no closer to answering my original one) is- We get to ride in a car/ truck not on a bicycle..... right? Because if one has a vehicle that I can ride in and the other has a bicycle that I have to steer, peddle and do things to, then I have instantly made my decision.

Final decision: I choose neither of those pricks. I'll just wait for the legit "ride or die" friend.