Friday, February 16, 2018

Is this really what it’s all come down to? Is this truly where we are?!

Before I begin, let me just say this.... this is not a post about my stance on gun control, violence, legislation, or any such thing.... this is a post about people. It's not political and I have no agenda. I am simply trying to make sense of what is happening in the world around us. And in trying to understand, it doesn't mean that I think I have all of the answers, because I absolutely do not.

I don't have any answers.

I usually steer clear of all subjects regarding anything considered "political" in a public forum. And it's not because I'm ashamed of what I think, and it's not because I'm afraid of how people will react to me and my opinions. I think I am just the type of person that doesn't feel the need to justify herself to satisfy others. As I said, this has nothing to do with politics.

But, it does have everything to do with people.


Earlier this week, on Wednesday, February 14, 2018, a gunman opened fire at a high school in Parkland, FL.

This event left seventeen people dead, several others injured, and countless lives changed forever.

While kids and staff were leaving their classrooms and the building for what they thought was a fire drill, a 19-year-old man by the name of Nikolas Cruz opened fire outside and in the hallways of Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School. For around six minutes, but what must have felt like an eternity, shots were fired outside and in the hallways and classrooms of the first and second floor. Some say that he went to the third floor and tried to shoot fleeing students. He eventually discarded his rifle, vest, and ammunition in a stairwell, and proceeded to weave his way into the students that were being evacuated to camouflage himself and escape the chaos that he had caused. He walked away like nothing had happened and proceeded to run errands and get himself a drink. Around an hour later, he was arrested on a residential street and taken into custody.

With that being said, I ask you one question.... why? Why would someone do this?

It feels like I was just here, sorting through all of these feelings and trying to understand.... because I was, back in October.

There are certain tragic moments that stick with people. And unfortunately, that number is only growing with each passing day. Just in my lifetime alone there have been too many to count. For some it's Oklahoma in 1995. Others, New York/Virginia/Pennsylvania in 2001. More recently, Newton Connecticut (known as Sandy Hook) in 2012, Boston in 2013, Orlando in 2016, Las Vegas in 2017. And just last month, there was a school shooting in Benton, Kentucky leaving two dead and eighteen injured.

For me, I remember when Columbine happened in 1999. I was just a little kid and was completely terrified to go to school.

I've tried over and over again to understand why someone would do something like this and each time I always come to the same conclusion.... and that conclusion is, I honestly have no idea. I don't know what makes someone think to do something like this and I don't think I'll ever comprehend any of it. Honestly, I don't even know that we're ever supposed to.

Something like this shouldn't be an everyday occurrence. We shouldn't be "expecting" things like this to happen and it shouldn't be common enough for people to be able to say "we saw this coming" or "we're not really all that surprised." How has it gotten here? HOW HAVE WE GOTTEN HERE? How have we all let our society get to this point? How have we let this continue?

More importantly, how can we stop this? I'm not guileless, I'm aware that violence has been present since the beginning of time and will always be a factor in our lives no matter how far we come. There's absolutely nothing that can be done to stop it. But, shouldn't we be able to help the situation in general? Shouldn't we be able to make horrible events such as this not be such a common occurrence one way or the other?

To say yes sounds naive, but to say no sounds.... hopeless.

When you're trying to wrap your head around something like this it's easy for you to come up with the solution in your head. It's easy for you to do the play by play and "fix it." But the truth is, no one person is going to fix something like this. This isn't a "person" problem it's a "people" problem.

It's also incredibly easy to give up hope. Once you read about these horrible events over and over again, it's remarkable how easy it is to lose all faith in humanity in general and chalk it all up to "people are the worst." And sure, we've all thought it before. I know I have.

But you want to know what makes me reevaluate that thought? It's never just one big thing.... it's always a bunch of little ones. There are people out there that are "the worst" but there are also people out there that are "the best." And those kind of people are what makes going on worth it.

I don't know how we're all going to get through this. As I said, I don't have the answers and couldn't even begin to pretend to know what they are.

This is no different than what I had to say about Columbine, 9/11, Sandy Hook, Orlando, or Vegas....

Something like this can bring out the very worst kinds of people. People so vile that you didn't even know they existed outside of film and novels. In almost every work of fiction, there is always an "evil" entity (antagonist), that the "hero" (protagonist) has to deal with. And it's designed like this, because without evil how would we ever measure kindness and the goodness in someone? Without it we wouldn't know to root for our heroes and have hope that in the end good will always conquer evil. We've all had this ingrained into us since we were children.... the prince saves the princess, the evil queen is destroyed, the hero comes out on top and we all go on to fight another day.

We hope that at the end of the day, everyone will get their happily ever afters.... except, that's not how real life works. When it comes to something like this, there are never really "winners" but it can feel like the evil is winning regardless. And it's a completely hopeless feeling. It always has been.

But then, sometimes, through all the darkness and the fog, a little tiny ray of hope can shine through. And sometimes, it's such a tiny little ray that if you don't pay attention or you're not looking for it, you can completely miss it.

Sure, moments like these can bring out some of the worst in people.... but, it can also bring out the very best of people.

You hear about the purity within someone such as helping others even though it might come at significant personal cost to themselves. And you hear about others making sure that someone will go on through them, because they touched their lives in such a deep way. You hear about communities coming together to treat, love, help.... and eventually, maybe even begin to heal.

When you're thinking about this, try to remember, this wasn't just "something that happened." And it's not just a "blip" on your newsfeed for a couple of weeks. It certainly isn't just a "dark spot in our history." At least, that's not all it should be remembered for. Remember the names: Alyssa Alhadeff. Scott Beigel. Martin Duque Aguiano. Nicholas Dworet. Aaron Feis. Jaime Guttenberg. Chris Hixon. Luke Hoyer. Cara Loughran. Gina Montalto. Joaquin Oliver. Alaina Petty. Meadow Pollack. Helena Ramsay. Alex Schachter. Carmen Schentrup. Peter Wang.

My heart and the sincerest part of myself goes out to these people and their families.

"Love one another and help others to rise to the higher levels, simply by pouring out love. Love is infectious, and the greatest healing energy." -Sai Baba

Wednesday, February 14, 2018

Ricardo has to go to the doctor and I won't get him back until tomorrow.

I received a letter (letter? notice?) in the mail telling me that Ricardo has a recall and I have to have him serviced immediately.

Which sounds kind of dirty, but I swear isn't. You see, my little Ricardo was born in 2011 and while he's a trooper, there was a mistake made with the seal on his Battery Junction Box (BJB), allowing debris and water into it.... causing corrosion.

And that's a problem, because apparently this little mistake can cause side effects of: loss of function of exterior lights, vehicle stall, vehicle no start, and loss of function of interior lights. All of which I need. Therefore, Ricardo has to go into the doctor (ie- shop) for repair.

I tried to get this handled last weekend.... completely willing to give up my Saturday by sitting in a shop/dealership awaiting his safe repair and return, but alas, it was not meant to be. You see, in order to have the repair done with no cost to me (because it's their mistake and people shouldn't have to pay out of pocket for it!), he has to go to a Ford Dealership.... which is handy, because Uncle D gave me his guy that takes care of their truck. BUT the dealership/shop doesn't do those kinds of repairs on weekends, because they don't have the staff.... and for various other reasons that I didn't 100% hear, because I was freaking out about not having my car.

Side note: What are the odds that those nice men will also clean the inside of Ricardo while he's hanging out for repair? Like, I cleaned him up all nice and pretty before winter hit hard.... but now he's a little dusty and could use a good vacuum. Honestly though, I don't see the point in trying to keep him "cleaned out" while in the depths of winter though. (And by "cleaned out" I mean I don't have him full of trash or anything like that, but the wetness + ice salt + muddy/wet boots + winter in general just isn't friendly to a "clean" car.).

It's also not a "huge" repair, but is time consuming, so they'll have to have Ricardo for a full day. ONE. FULL. DAY. Are you hearing me on this? Since I work towards downtown and come in at 6:30am and the dealership doesn't open until 8:00am (and is twenty to twenty-five minutes away) I have to drop Ricardo off after work today and I won't be able to pick him up until tomorrow after work. Meaning I won't have him for about 24 HOURS. And my anxiety is not having this shit.

Lucky for me, Aunt Poot agreed to follow me down to give me a ride home this evening and take me back tomorrow for pickup.... and my brother is going to be getting up on his day off at 6:00am to bring me to work tomorrow (against his will).

While they have Ricardo for his recall repair, I'm gonna go ahead and have them change his oil, check the fluids, and rotate the tires (I think they call it "the works"?) too. Might as well, right? No sense of them having him for a full day for a repair and then having to take him back in for the oil change (it's a little overdue) and whatnot an entirely separate day.

And to be honest, Ricardo deserves a little pampering. Afterall, he's dealt with me learning how to "redrive" after all of those years I was too scared to.... he's been patient, understanding, and has held his own through the process. From the beginning of easing everywhere slow and being 100% unsure of myself to now where I am comfortable (for the most part) and drive a tad-bit crazy (like I used to before I got scared).

He truly is a champ and I love him.... a champ, that has a flaw in his "junk" (junction box). Then again, don't we all?!!?!

UPDATE: Ricardo's stay at the doctor (aka- shop) has been postponed to a later date.... the flu is a nasty little creature that seems to be making its way through a little bit of everybody for the past two months. Therefore, this little "trip" will have to wait a week or two. Hopefully, not longer than that, but you never know.... we just take every situation as it presents itself.

Tuesday, February 13, 2018

I feel the same today as I did ten years ago. *insert sleepy face here*

Today is my twenty-eighth birthday and I'm not really sure how I should feel about that? Except that I want to go back to bed.

Sure, I'm older.... I'm creeping up on thirty, but I don't "feel" any different than what I ever have. I've never been one of those "I just had a birthday so that means I'm older and a completely different person now" kind of people. I know most people say that once they reach a certain age they begin to feel "different." Maybe even more grown up?

Perhaps I haven't reached that age yet, or maybe I will never have that kind of "moment" but I can honestly say that twenty-eight feels absolutely no different than twenty-seven did. (Except now I have to tell people that I'm even older than I was yesterday.... but isn't that true for all of us?!).

In fact, twenty-eight feels no different than eighteen felt. Well, aside from the whole being out of highschool and able to buy booze thing.

Momma asked me this morning, "so, how's it feel to be eighteen?" (We all have a running joke in our family that dictates you never say someone's real age while teasing). And I told her, honestly it feels exactly like it did ten years ago.... except now I have to buy bigger jeans and I'm a little more cynical (who even knew that was possible?!!?!).

Side note: Dani did bring me "birthday doughnuts" to work this morning from the Amish bakery and they were the most delicious thing EVER. I had one that was caramel wrapped in cinnamon and powdered sugar.... yeah, you heard me right.

What are my big birthday plans for this year? Well.... absolutely nothing. And I love that. I came to work like it was any old day (because honestly, it is) and will go about my business like nothing is different (again, because it really isn't). Tonight my twenty-eight self will eat the roast that my twenty-seven self was forward thinking enough to put in the crockpot for supper last night. And it will be winter business as usual.... supper, snuggles with Tayder, warm shower, snacks, wine, and Netflix.

Maybe I'll watch a scary movie in honor of my birthday? (Because scary movies are my favorite and I love when my birthday falls on Fridays, because then I can be all "it's Friday the 13th!"). No parties or binge-drinking.... no craziness or recklessness. Just nice and "boring" and calm (and that's just the way I love it).

And that, my friends, is what twenty-eight looks like from over here.

Friday, February 9, 2018

I don't even know how to respond to that, so I'm gonna ignore it for hours.

I'm all for social media and lord knows that I post some random things, but you know what I've never done? I've never sent someone a message on social media and then thought to myself, "you know what would make this message the bomb? a shirtless selfie to accompany it."

I've also never thought it was a good idea to take naked (or half-naked) photos of myself for any reason and then be surprised when people I didn't "intend" to see them actually do see them. (Apparently people are doing that and are then surprised when someone breaks into their phones and shares said photos?)

However, that's not the case with everyone as when I woke up this morning I had a message (via FB Messenger) from a guy that I've known since I was like eight that said, "Soooooo bored" that he just so happened to attach to it a shirtless selfie of him laying on his bed.... and that's apparently his hobby, because that camera angle was just way too weird and deadset to just be a "fluke."

So, I guess my questions is.... is this what we're doing now?

Also, has this ever actually worked and someone just randomly send a shirtless photo back for absolutely no reason other than you received one in the first place?

Actually, you know what, I don't even have a question, because honestly I don't want answers.

Speaking of answers, apparently when someone sends you a shirtless selfie you're supposed to reciprocate? (A friend of mine informed me of this, I was painfully unaware). Which is probably why he didn't think my response of "Get Netflix. It helps boredom." was too funny. Personally, I found it to be hilarious and sage advice.... and that's probably why I'm considered to be sarcastic. Sorry dude, you shouldn't be texting people at almost eleven o'clock on a Thursday night anyways for any reason, let alone so they can see you shirtless.... ESPECIALLY when they didn't ask. (How old did that just make me sound?)

I say I'm spicy.... they say I'm a jerk.... we'll agree to disagree. TGIF, dude.

Wednesday, February 7, 2018

I get where they're going with it, but ugh, do you really?!!?!

Are people still calling Wednesday "Hump Day"?
You know what, don't answer that.
I'm pretty sure I don't even wanna know.... my faith in humanity is too low at this point.
You know, because people won't quit eating f*cking laundry detergent.

I have an important meeting this afternoon.
Wish me luck, downtown traffic and directions are not my friend.
And yes, I insist on being vague and saying "my meeting" because it makes me feel like a spy.

Also, I have two episodes of Hawaii Five-O left for streaming on Netflix and then I will have completed ALL seven seasons.

Sometimes, it's the little things.

Monday, February 5, 2018

Ten years can seem like either yesterday or an entire lifetime ago.

It's not every day that someone can look at you and ask "where were you on this day exactly ten years ago" and you legitimately remember. Most of us have no clue and if you're like me, I can barely remember what I was doing two days ago, let alone a decade. But, there are those few circumstances that stand out and warrant your memory.

Back in February 2008, my family and I were living in Tennessee. We had only been back for a couple of months and were for the most part adjusting to living in the country again (a small readjustment for myself, as I have always loved living in the country). I was a senior in highschool, scheduled to graduate that May (and I still can't quite believe that was a decade ago), working at the nursing home, thinking about how those were my last days of being seventeen, and enjoying being with all of my friends whom I had loved and missed.

Most of us remember that February ten years ago for an entirely different reason than anything that I just listed, including myself. You see, back then something happened that would go on to be referred to as the "2008 Super Tuesday Tornado Outbreak." Essentially it was a total of eighty-seven tornadoes occurring between the afternoon of February 5th and the early morning of February 6th throughout four states and eighteen counties. Among the damage there were fifty-seven people killed, hundreds injured, and countless lives changed forever.


I remember it like it was yesterday. We all knew there was a bad storm coming, and were doing the usual to prepare ourselves, but didn't think too much of it at first, because we had lived in "Tornado Alley" for the better part of our lives. But, that night changed it.... at the time, the outbreak was the deadliest in the era of modern NEXRAD doppler radar (which came into effect in 1997). And no matter how much everyone thought they were prepared, the truth was, none of us were prepared for any of it in the least little bit.

For over fifteen hours everyone just had to try to tell themselves that if they got through that part, then everything would be ok. The truth was, no one had any clue if everything would be ok or if we would even pull through it. You never really understand the resilience of people until you're standing there with them and neither of you knows what to do, but you just do something.

The beginning of this catastrophic storm started in Arkansas, and once it started it didn't stop. One of the first signs that we knew something major was happening was when a major fire was started, because a natural gas plant was in the path of the tornado and was ripped apart. Luckily, they had evacuated that area and no one was injured inside of the plant.... but you could see those colors against the sky just as clear as day. I'll never forget it. We lived in an apartment at the time (and our apartment was in a holler) and once we heard the giant "BOOM" we all ran outside to figure out what was going on. What was going on was the natural gas plant had been ripped apart and exploded and against the coal black sky all you could see was the prettiest red/pink/orange colors. I know it sounds ridiculous to call it pretty, but it truly was.

It sounds a little dramatic to say that the tornado "leveled half of our county" but it's not being dramatic, it's the truth. There were over one hundred seventy homes completely destroyed, thirteen people lost their lives, and there were almost fifty more seriously injured. Our county felt the effects of that night for years, and at times, still do. Over a million dollars worth of the trees were destroyed, putting a severe hurting on our logging industry that are comprised of mostly family owned businesses that have been operational for generations.

President George W. Bush actually came into our county a couple of days later (on February 8th) to take in the damage for himself and promised that aid was on its way, even though we were doing our best to help each other.

Pieces of our county (debris) were found as far as seventy miles away from where they had been before the storm. We had lost all power and had to pull together to stay warm, eat, and make sure that people got the medical attention that they required. Alot of people didn't have power for a week and they closed our schools for a couple of weeks. They estimated that there was upwards of seventy-eight million dollars worth of damage in our tiny county alone.

Many of my friends were/are on the rescue/fire squad and we all came together and tried to do our part the best we could. Personally, I went with three friends of mine and we delivered generators and cases of water to churches and various buildings that had been converted into makeshift shelters for hours upon hours. It was so cold and everyone tried to collect as many blankets and clothes as we possibly could for everyone. Some of the people that were injured even had to do physically therapy at the nursing home where I worked. Strangers helped one another, people were pulled from rubble, you let others in to share your heat, and food was more like a community gathering for awhile. It's an incredibly sad thing to see, but to know how some people can come together in the face of tragedy is amazing and truly shows you that no matter what, there are decent, good, hardworking people out there willing to lend a hand and help others.

It's been ten years, and sometimes it still feels like it was yesterday.

I don't think I'll ever forget that night. I don't think any of us ever will.

Friday, February 2, 2018

This week has been a year long and I'm so happy it's finally Friday.

After thinking that Wednesday was Thursday and yesterday was Friday, it's finally Friday.
And I don't think people realize how appreciative I am over it.
Because this week has been seventeen years long.

I may or may not have grown a patch of gray hair from this week alone.
This is the second Friday in a row that Dani has brought me doughnuts.
The sickness is still going around, but I think people are starting to feel better?

Did I mention how happy I am that it's Friday and therefore a couple days off?
Because I am and I'm not even sorry about it.

Here's to the weekend. Cheers, y'all.

Thursday, February 1, 2018

A poem about me: I hate people, I wish I was drunk (and at home). The end.

Today is Thursday. Did you know that?
I thought yesterday was Thursday ALL DAMN DAY.
So, you can imagine my irritation when I woke up and discovered today wasn't Friday.

Apparently this is the week for sickness (Momma, Bubba, & Dani are all sick).
It's also the week for paying people back.
Not in the "Mafia" way.
In the regular you owe someone something and you're in the position to give it to them way.

It's a nice feeling and takes some of the edge off.
Not all of it, because I have too much anxiety for all that.

I'm on Season06, Episode24 of Hawaii Five-O.
Only two episodes left and then it's on to the final season offered on Netflix.

I still want today to be Friday though.

Tuesday, January 30, 2018

The Super Bowl is five days away and my family might disown me by then.

Super Bowl LII is five days away and as per our tradition (it’s a tradition that has been started since we moved back around family in Indy five years ago), we will be going to Aunt Poot and Uncle D’s to watch the game (and eat way more junk than what's appropriate). And sometimes a couple of my cousins are there, but it's usually just the four of us.

Except this is year might be my last time to be in attendance for all eternity.

Let me explain. You see, this year, at the Bowl it will be the Eagles vs the Patriots and while I’m not a Patriots fan, I am a HUGE Rob Gronkowski fan. And last year at the Bowl it was the Patriots vs the Falcons and the Pats won.... and managed to piss off almost every single person that I’ve ever met.

Except me. Why? Because as I said, I’m a Gronkowski (I know he goes by just Gronk, but for some reason I love saying the word Gronkowski) fan and while he was out last year (he’s been plagued by injuries.... and it pisses me off that some of them could’ve been prevented, but they make him take more, because of his size.... but that’s an argumentative post for another day), I still got to see him on a giant ass screen in all of his glory. Would I have preferred to see him playing? Sure. But I also wouldn’t want somebody to hurt themselves beyond recovery “just because” or over a job.

And every single person that was in the living room the night we watched Super Bowl LI wanted to put me in a headlock until I took back the fact that I was ok with the Pats winning on the pure basis that I think Gronkowski pulls those rings off well.

It probably also didn’t help that I documented every single time they even remotely glanced the camera his way.

But I digress, because I’m pretty sure my family can probably sense a disturbance in the force since I’ve mentioned a Patriot so many times. They’re so crazy when it comes to it (they are all diehard Colts fans.... except my Momma who is a diehard Steelers fan and is good with my love for Gronkowski), you would think I had said “Beetlejuice” three times in a row.

Beetlejuice.... Beetlejuice.... just kidding, I won’t say it again. (Except technically I’ve already said it three times so I can’t remember is that counts or not?)

There's been some doubt as to whether or not Gronkowski will be eligible to play at this years Bowl (he's currently on concussion protocol), but I have a feeling that if he gets ANY say in the matter, he will be ready to roll.... because you know he hated standing on the sidelines and shit last year.

Either way, here's hoping he's all good and healthy.... and that I can outrun the majority of my family.

Monday, January 29, 2018

"Is f*ck off an emotion? Because I feel it in my soul." -Me, most days.

It's Monday.
I didn't want to get up out of bed this morning.
Mostly, I didn't mind the getting up, I just didn't want to leave the house.
I just can't be responsible for my adulting today.

We need the weekend back. Mostly, I need the weekend back.

Sunday, January 28, 2018

The Comings and Goings of Netflix: February 2018.

Last month I decided that since I watch so much television (#NoRegrets), I would keep track of what's coming to and leaving Netflix each month. Not that it matters, but it's a helpful little thing to let everyone know what's up.

Except not really, because instead of naming everything coming/leaving, I only mention the things that I care about and/or effect me.

Sometimes you don't really care about this kind of thing, because "there's so much to choose from" but there are times that it really pisses you off. Like the fact that they removed It's Always Sunny from Netflix back on December 9th and I can't watch it at all anymore, because I decided to get rid of Hulu (literally the only thing I watched it for was Charlie and The Gang).

There's really not a whole lot that I'm excited/upset about, except for the fact that they'll be removing all seven season of Burn Notice and I've literally been trying to watch that show for about three? four? years now. I binge-watched it for a bit and then switch to something else and won't pick it back up for months. And now I won't have that option.

Coming to Netflix February 1, 2018: American Pie, American Pie 2, American Pie Presents: Bandcamp, American Pie Presents: The Naked Mile, Goodfellas, Kill Bill Vol.1, Kill Bill Vol. 2, Lara Croft: Tomb Raider. Coming to Netflix February 9, 2018: When We First Met. Coming to Netflix February 20, 2018: Bates Motel (season 5). Coming to Netflix February 21, 2018: Lincoln. Coming to Netflix February 24, 2018: Jeepers Creepers 3.

Leaving Netflix February 1, 2018: Corpse Bride, King Arthur, Project X, The Nightmare Before Christmas. Leaving Netflix February 3, 2018: Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning. Leaving Netflix February 15, 2018: Burn Notice (seasons 1-7). Leaving Netflix February 20, 2018: Aziz Ansari: Dangerously Delicious.

Friday, January 26, 2018

Let's blow this popsicle stand and go drink and watch Netflix.

It's Friday.
I had both doughnuts and white castle for breakfast.
And I received three presents today (including whisky) for absolutely no reason.
I'm good with it.... it's been a long week.

Here's to the weekend. Cheers, y'all.

Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Book em' Dano.... you don't like it?!.... I don't like it.... I think it's catchy.

I mentioned that I was watching Hawaii Five-O awhile back and back then I was only on season two. (And by "back then" I mean fifteen days ago). Now, I am about halfway through season five and still going strong. Do you know how rare it is for me to get into a series like this and actually keep interest long enough to get into season five? I mean, damn, Gina.

I've been trying to watch The Walking Dead for four years or so and I've given up on NUMEROUS series. Sure, I've finished the occasional- It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, The League, Sirens, and I've finished "seasons" of shows.

But the fact that I usually give up somewhere between season two and three of a series is a given.

I once decided to watch all eight seasons of that show Dexter and I actually made it to the eighth season.... and with ten episodes in the ENTIRE series left.... I quit. Literally, I just stopped watching it and that was around four or five years ago (I think?) and I don't honestly remember enough to go back and finish, I would have to start completely over. And that's a no from me (for now).

And with Hawaii Five-O, I'm currently on Season Five, Episode Thirteen.

I felt that since I'm this far in and actually want to keep watching the show, not just forcing myself to watch it, that I should tell you some of my feelings thus far (but dear lord, not all of them, because there would be too many, because I have ALOT of feelings concerning this show).... with 105 episodes under my belt.

-I agree with Danny and Steve is a big soft cookie (all warm and gooey on the inside) and I want him to be happy and somebody to not break his heart and love him (other than Danny, which I am also ok with).
-Danny's ex-wife is a bitch and I don't like how she always uses their child to her advantage and demeans his role as a well-meaning and purely good father.
-Watching Steve strap Mary's baby to his chest and take care of her (including with the "sun hat") was adorable.
-Wo Fat lived way longer than any one man ever should have and I'm super glad that Steve shot him in the face, because that man was NOTHING BUT TROUBLE.
-I knew Jenna Kaye couldn't be trusted. (I based this entirely on the fact that she played Bianca in 10 Things I Hate About You).
-I was really #TeamCatherine and I loved her character and how badass she was and now I kind of want to kick her in the face for breaking Steve's little baby, cookie heart.
-(Speaking of pain in the ass woman that are in Steve's life) Doris is a pain in the ass and while she says "I'm doing it to help, I'm doing it to protect you, yadda yadda" that she's actually no help at all and only makes more trouble.
-Every single episode should have Kamekona in it and that's not a suggestion, that's a fact.
-I didn't think that I was gonna like Lou in the beginning.... but I'm glad I was wrong and he changed my mind.
-Lori Weston and Steve had a little "connection" and I was mostly against it, because I loved Catherine, but now knowing how Catherine turned out, I'm rooting for Lori again. (Plus, she was funny).
-If they don't quit torturing Steve, I'm gonna lose my shit.
-I want to trust Joe White, but I also don't trust Joe White as far as I can throw him.
-Kono is a certified badass and the fact that she not only chased the love of her life around the world (when he could've just been dead the entire time), but that she continues to kick "gang" ass is amazing.
-Protective Steve is the best Steve.
-Grace is adorable and they don't show her with Danno and Uncle Steve enough.
-Steve saving Danny's life and then Danny saving Steve's life is what I'm here for!!
-Terrorist hacker or not, I can't take a Jonas Brother seriously.
-Y'all, Chin Ho Kelly needs a damn break already! People have literally not stopped with this guy since the show started. (Although, I guess that's fair with all of the characters).
-Can we just talk about how sweet it was that when Kono missed her graduation that the guys (Steve, Danny, and Chin) threw her an impromptu one?!
-I like Hawaii Danny better than I think I would like Jersey Danny.
-This girlfriend of Danny's (Amber) is my favorite compared to the other girlfriend (Gabby) and his ex-wife (Rachel).
-Danny 150% told that guy he was going to kill him very soon for killing his brother.... and watching Danny in that scene was HEARTBREAKING.
-Now that I think about it.... alot of these scenes are heartbreaking.
-I want more of Danny's pain in the ass nephew Eric.
-Steve should have to be in uniform all. the. time. Danno should have to be in "relaxed" clothing all. the. time.
-Steve can give a speech like a motherf*cker.
-I like the second Governor better than the first.
-High ranking Military man: "You're going to have to step out." Danny: "Uh no, I'm gonna stay right here." High ranking Military man: "Excuse me?!!?!" Danny: "Yeah, see.... I'm not a soldier so you have no authority over me. So, I'm gonna stay right here with my boy." Me: "HAHAHAHHHAAA, YEEESSSSS, GGGOOOOO DDDANNNNYYY WWILLIAMS!!!"
-Steve and Danny should ride around in that tiny red toy car more often.
-How dare they let Chin Ho have that teeny tiny moment of happiness (marrying Malia) and then ripping it away even faster than it began (when she was murdered). Side note: Props to Adam for saving Kono, though.
-Oh, paranoid, but still mostly right Jerry.
-Of course, Daryl Dixon and Spike played International Fugitive brothers. *shaking my damn head*
-The "carguments" in this show would be severely missed.

Monday, January 22, 2018

You can always count on your real friends to remember.

I can feel the hatred that I have for this day (this day being a Monday) deep in my soul.
But I still had to come into work like an adult.
No worries, my friends find ways to get me through these kinds of days.

Every single friend in my entire life:

"Hey, I found this really old and questionable picture of Katie that makes us all remember how much of a dork she has always been.... let's go ahead and post that right now."

Courtesy of Krista (JB's wife) on FB 1/22/18 (circa 2002....2003?!)

Friday, January 19, 2018

LaCroix.... yeah, that's definitely gonna be a no for me.

I should know better than to try and replace something that I love in my life with something that I'm unsure of.

You see, I'm basically the essential guide to "old and set in her ways" without actually being old. I'm only twenty-seven (twenty-eight next month) and while that's not a teenager, it's still fairly young. Let me say it again, I'M YOUNG, DAMMIT.

Recently I've decided that it would probably be a good idea to try and make tiny changes to maybe make myself either be a little bit healthier, or at the very least, feel a little bit healthier. It's not one of those "resolution" type of things, as I started thinking about it long before the new year.

I don't want to make any big changes or anything, because I basically like everything that I already do, eat, say, etc., but I thought a couple of small changes couldn't hurt.

The biggest small change (shut up, it's a thing) that I've been rolling around in my head is that I should cut out soda from my life. Now listen, I know that doesn't sound like a huge change, BUT I love soda. Granted, I'm not picky about what I drink by any means and I love many other beverages, but the fact that soda is my go-to is just a plain fact.

I'm not sure what it is about soda, but I'm assuming that it's all of the deliciousness smooshed into a can or bottle (or soda fountain!).... and maybe it has crack in it and we just don't know it yet?!!?!

I heard somewhere that if you're trying to give up soda that replacing it with flavored sparkling water was a great way to help, because it combines two things that most people miss with soda: flavoring (alot of people don't like the taste of "plain" water) and carbonation.

With that in mind, when I went to the grocery store yesterday I went ahead and picked up a pack of LaCroix flavored sparkling water (cherry lime). I let it stay in the fridge for hours, because I figured it would be better cold and then I cracked a can of it open.... and almost puked.

Y'all, I don't know if it's the brand, the flavor, the fact that it's sparkling water or what, but it was DISGUSTING. It tastes like when you get a coke out of the fountain with ice and there's only carbonation and no flavoring in it and when you drink it you want to puke. And that's really surprising to me, because I've seen people rave about this stuff over and over again (hence the idea of trying it in the first damn place.... y'all are liars and I don't know how you can like it!).

I didn't even finish the can I opened, I actually took two sips and poured that shit down the drain. Now, I have seven cans (they come in an eight pack) that I'm just going to have to get rid of, because I'm not drinking it and try to find something else to replace soda. (Says the girl that's drinking a coke right now).

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

This is a shit show and it needs to take a step back. *insert eyeroll here*

Y'all, it's currently -4° outside and teenagers won't quit eating Tide Laundry Pods. WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING?!!

Didn't we all agree that we weren't going to have another year like 2017 (or 2016, for that matter)? I feel like we all got together and collectively agreed on this. We all said that we were going to try to take things easier, slow down a little bit, try not to have so much bad, and get to the bottom of our issues and solve them like adults.

And now, here we are. IN THIS SHIT SHOW THAT WE CALL JANUARY 2018.

Did I mention that people are eating laundry detergent? I'm sorry if I keep bringing it up, but I literally can't get over the fact that people are being this stupid. Also, how are they affording this ridiculous habit? Washing powder is expensive, dammit! (How old did I just sound right there?!)

I would like to say that it's moments like these that make me want to stay indoors and avoid the outside world and people in general.... but if I'm being perfectly honest, I feel like that the majority of the time either way.

Do y'all know what my friends and I were doing as teenagers?! I mean, I can't go into specifics, because we all made a pact to NEVER speak of some of that shit ever again (ah, the days before social media) and we did stupid shit, but we DIDN'T EAT LAUNDRY DETERGENT.

Although, one time a friend of mine's brother ate some old gum off the school bus floor, but that's just because he was kind of strange (and apparently, hungry?). I feel like that's not on the same level. You might think it is, but I would have to disagree.

My point is, can we stop with all of this ridiculousness (the situation, not the show, because I love me some Rob Dyrdek) and maybe I don't know....NOT LET THIS BE KNOWN AS THE YEAR THAT PEOPLE DIED FROM CONSTANTLY EATING LAUNDRY DETERGENT?!!?! Here's to hoping.... come on, 2018, we're rooting for you (and us by extension).

Monday, January 15, 2018

Pick a Headline: "Baltimore man shoots at wife and daughter over grilled cheese sandwich, barricades himself in home and has standoff with police."

This morning on our office radio, the hosts were playing a game called "overreaction or not?" They listed some of the things that have happened in the last week and decided if the person was justified in their reactions or not.

Some of the things listed were: "Man has to tear down garage, because vindictive neighbor calls the city" (did he not know that was going to happen?), "Woman stabs niece in ear with screwdriver over a game of Monopoly" (yes, that's an overreaction), but the very first one takes the cake and leaves you saying WTF?!

"Man shoots at wife and daughter, because someone took a bite of his grilled cheese sandwich."

Apparently, once the man found that someone had take a bite of his sandwich, he discharged his gun in his home (thankfully, striking no one) and his wife managed to call the police.

After they arrived, the woman and daughter came running out of the house, but the man decided to have a four hour standoff with police, before "surrendering peacefully."

Surrendering peacefully? I mean, I guess that's the best that you can hope for with a standoff.... right?!

No one really knows if it was the daughter or wife that took a bite of the sandwich, and the only thing I'm thinking is.... is that really the most important question here?! Leave it to the press and all of that investigative journalism to get the important facts. *insert eye roll here*

I don't even know how there was a debate on if this was an overreaction or not. I mean, I get it, you're pissed, because someone took a bite of your sandwich and grilled cheese are delicious.... but you seriously think you need to shoot a gun off in the house to get your point across?

I know he didn't hit anyone, but he very well could have. Thankfully, this dude is being held for psychiatric evaluation.

Side note: this is not a "stance on gun control" or anything like that. I don't have anything against guns, in fact, I find them useful for many purposes (like hunting). I do, however, have a problem with idiots like this guy.

Saturday, January 13, 2018

My irrational fears: Sharks and why I fear the ocean out of respect.

Someone asked me one time what I was scared of. Afterall, some people are scared of spiders or small spaces, others clowns, and honestly the list just keeps going on. I couldn’t think of anything off the top of my head, so I let them know I wasn’t sure.

Of course, jokes were made that “I wasn’t scared of anything” and I “must be related to John Rambo” but the truth is, there are things that scare me. I just needed a minute to think them through.

You see, I have fears that are a little.... how should I say this?.... we'll go with odd. I wouldn’t say I’m the oddest given the fact that some people are afraid of cellophane, but that’s neither here nor there.

My list of fears include: ventriloquist dummies, outer space, falling from high places (I’m not actually afraid of heights, but I am afraid of falling from somewhere high), Freddy Kreuger.... and sharks.

Actually, if I’m being fair, the entire ocean in general petrifies me, but I’m sticking with sharks on this go around. I’m not sure why, when I was a kid I loved swimming out and would go out pretty far. I wasn’t in the same skill set as an Olympic swimmer or anything, but I was decent enough. My brother, cousins, friends, and I used to horse around out there with no more than a half thought. We would all be out there for HOURS and never once did we think about being eaten alive.

And now? It seems the older I get, the more bodies of water sharks terrify me.

It probably doesn’t help that some of my favorite movies include sharks (have y’all seen Deep Blue Sea?), and that I won’t stop watching them, even though clearly it’s becoming a problem. (Anxiety, amirite?!).

So, what does my dumbass do even though it could potentially give me heart failure?! Well, I watched a particularly terrifying movie that was literally my worst f*cking nightmare crammed into 85 minutes.... 47 Meters Down.

Yeah, because that isn’t my greatest fear come true.

You know what I learned from this movie?! I learned that #1: You NEVER trust a man named Taylor and #2: If you have a fear and your gut is telling you to not do that shit, then you should probably listen to yourself and NOT do it.

Also, if you have a fear of sharks that takes you to the point of hyperventilation.... you should probably be smarter than me and stop watching shark movies. You know, those who can't do, teach, and such.