We're definitely more Trikru than Skaikru.

On January 29, an American Airlines plane and Blackhawk helicopter collided. And I can't help but to think... January 29th must be a bad omen type of day. It shouldn't have to be said, but I'll say it anyways, I feel absolutely terrible for all these people.

Since then, it feels like I have seen NOTHING but news reports about plane crashes. 

We're a traveling family, but we do all driving because my hubby is scared of... well... flying in planes. I always thought it was a valid fear but now more so than before. Didn't think it was possible, but it is.

Apparently there hasn't been a major US plane crash since 2009... and now we're creeping the deep in 2025? The fuck?

Listen... I don't know if this means some kind of Terminator malfunction is happening and it's crashing planes from here on out until they (hopefully?) find the glitch or if it's because this one major plane crash happened and the media feels the need to tell us about all the crashes that have been happening the whole time.

Either way... super uncomfortable and not fucking on board with it, dude.

I don't have the heart to tell her they creep me the f*ck out.

When D moved to Indy so we could be together, we both knew that he would miss his family something terrible. He doesn't complain about it often and never tries to make me feel guilty about it, but I know deep down that he misses seeing them as often as he once did.

Luckily, his mom has been able to make a few trips up in the last year, once even bringing one of his nephews, and now more than ever, we've learned that Facetime can be a beautiful thing.... like when she facetimed us during his brothers baby shower and we got to partake in the festivities, even though we couldn't technically be there in person.

With that being said, we are planning a trip for the beginning of next year, and hope to make it down sometime in March. D knows how much I hate the heat (even though I would endure it so he could see his family), so he wants to go down while it's still fairly cool.

We'll of course be taking our three pups and driving his car for the journey. Since we can fold down the backseats and make a giant palette, it should be fairly comfortable. Even though Tayder will demand to sit up front with me the whole time, because he is not a backseat kind of pup. We plan to see the majority of his family (mom, stepdad, dad, brother, sister, grandparents, etc.) and one of my uncles that doesn't live too far from his grandparents. It should be real nice.

His mom insists that we spend the majority of time at their house, as they live on a few acres of land and have room for days. They have horses, pigs, dogs, ducks, chickens, cats, etc. and with my love of animals, she figured it would be a good fit. She is also pretty adamant that she's going to take me riding, since I've never been on a horse in my entire life.

Yes, the girl who grew up on a farm, surrounded by other peoples farmland, working tobacco, hauling cattle, hunting, fishing, and generally being in the middle of nowhere backcountry, has never been on a horse. But.... that's not by accident. You see, horses freak me the f*ck out.

I'm an awful "girl" by way of, I don't think they're majestic or magical creatures (unless you put a horn and some glitter on them), although I will admit that there is something freeing and amazing at watching them run through fields, or in moments like Dances with Wolves. I've never had the fantasy about being "rescued" by a prince on a white horse and I never wanted to own a "pony" growing up. And I never understood the girls that did.

It's not that I hate them or anything, they're beautiful creatures, I just happen to prefer cows. Not saying that's a substitute, but you get the idea. I even took an Ag class in high school where we had to count the hands high of horses and I was all about the book work, but didn't necessarily love the dealing with horses one on one part.

I know, I know. TRUST ME, I KNOW how ridiculous this sounds. You would think that my twenty-nine year old ass would be over this ridiculousness at this point, but I am not. In fact, there are very few things that creep me out in life.... outer space, ventriloquist dummies, Freddie Krueger, and horses. (Now that I think about it, the list of things that freak me out is getting longer and I'm not sure if that's anxiety related or I'm just a f*cking psycho?)

The sad thing is though, no one knows about this. And it's not necessarily a fear or anything, like the thought of horses doesn't freak me out, but the thought of being with them or riding them.... I kind of might have a slight anxiety attack. Which isn't that bad anymore, considering that I have so many anxiety attacks that they all just kind of blend together at this point.

But, she is most definitely looking forward to teaching me how to "ride" and while I want to panic and shake my head no, I don't have the heart to tell her that the animals she loves so much might kill her DIL. Not to be dramatic, but I'm being dramatic.

I guess come March, we shall see how this goes.

You call it a gift.... I call it tornado weather. *insert paranoid look here*

It’s currently February 20th and 73° outside.... what. the. f*ck?!!?! (You would think I would want to be outside, but I don't).

Am I the only one that feels like this is some godawful trick? Like, I appreciate not freezing my ass off and my toes not turning blue from sloshing around in ice/snow/rain/salt at 6:00am, but there’s no way this is gonna turn out well for us. Hey, people who don’t think global warming is a thing.... what up?!!?!

Since when should we expect to go around in capris and a tshirt in the middle (middlish? endish?) of February?!

I don't remember agreeing to it and even though most people are happy about it, I'm 157% sure that we're gonna have to pay for this "good" weather in the next few weeks.

You could probably chalk all of this up to my raised in the holler paranoia (we all have it and believe in it where I was raised), but I swear, this is perfect tornado weather.

And no, I’m not wishing for one (because no thank you and then some).... but, there’s no doubt in my mind that this is the weather for it. Warm during a normally cold season.... humidity in the air, but also maintaining a cool breeze.... sporadic raindrops.... and utter peacefulness in the middle of the night.

It’s so warm that I actually had to turn our A/C on for a couple of hours tonight, because it got 81° in our house and Tayder and I do not sleep well when it’s hot (in all fairness though, I hardly ever sleep anyways and keep him up by extension). 81° IN F*CKING FEBRUARY.

We may get lucky though (fingers crossed), because it’s supposed to be getting back down into the thirties/forties and stay pretty consistent for the rest of the week (not including all the rain that’s heading in).

Wish us luck.... and remember, this is only the semi-drunken rambling of a gal who drinks too much wine. (Too much? HA!).

My irrational fears: Sharks and why I fear the ocean out of respect.

Someone asked me one time what I was scared of. Afterall, some people are scared of spiders or small spaces, others clowns, and honestly the list just keeps going on. I couldn’t think of anything off the top of my head, so I let them know I wasn’t sure.

Of course, jokes were made that “I wasn’t scared of anything” and I “must be related to John Rambo” but the truth is, there are things that scare me. I just needed a minute to think them through.

You see, I have fears that are a little.... how should I say this?.... we'll go with odd. I wouldn’t say I’m the oddest given the fact that some people are afraid of cellophane, but that’s neither here nor there.

My list of fears include: ventriloquist dummies, outer space, falling from high places (I’m not actually afraid of heights, but I am afraid of falling from somewhere high), Freddy Kreuger.... and sharks.

Actually, if I’m being fair, the entire ocean in general petrifies me, but I’m sticking with sharks on this go around. I’m not sure why, when I was a kid I loved swimming out and would go out pretty far. I wasn’t in the same skill set as an Olympic swimmer or anything, but I was decent enough. My brother, cousins, friends, and I used to horse around out there with no more than a half thought. We would all be out there for HOURS and never once did we think about being eaten alive.

And now? It seems the older I get, the more bodies of water sharks terrify me.

It probably doesn’t help that some of my favorite movies include sharks (have y’all seen Deep Blue Sea?), and that I won’t stop watching them, even though clearly it’s becoming a problem. (Anxiety, amirite?!).

So, what does my dumbass do even though it could potentially give me heart failure?! Well, I watched a particularly terrifying movie that was literally my worst f*cking nightmare crammed into 85 minutes.... 47 Meters Down.

Yeah, because that isn’t my greatest fear come true.

You know what I learned from this movie?! I learned that #1: You NEVER trust a man named Taylor and #2: If you have a fear and your gut is telling you to not do that shit, then you should probably listen to yourself and NOT do it.

Also, if you have a fear of sharks that takes you to the point of hyperventilation.... you should probably be smarter than me and stop watching shark movies. You know, those who can't do, teach, and such.