Wednesday, July 20, 2016

I can't wait to complain about how cold it is..... again.

(This summer is being a little bitch and I am not a fan. I always liked fall/winter better anyways).

(The above picture is from a blog post written by Samantha Irby over at Bitches Gotta Eat. I had to share it, because it reflects my sentiments perfectly.).

Do y'all remember when I was talking about winter sticking around for an unusual amount of time this year, and how everybody was going crazy from cabin fever, because going out was like dipping your balls (whether you have physical or metaphorical ones) in the same water that took Jack Dawson? We were all in denial and still doing events for warm weather, even though we were cold as shit. Remember all of that? Well, good news, that is no longer the case.

In fact, the weather changed around overnight and I mean that 100%. On a Thursday night it was 27° and the following Friday it got up to 89°. And that's not even an over-exaggeration. It literally went from freezing into Mad Max for an entirely different reason. As in, now it's so hot and dry it feels like a desert wasteland. Or something like that.

The humidity is at an all time high, and it's currently 93° outside. And it's 11:31 am. Yeah, it's already 93° this early in the day. And let's not even talk about the humidity and heat index. Ugh. And it's supposed to be this temp/humidity all week and possibly for the rest of my life, because global warming and shit.

Come on, mother nature, with this election coming up, we have enough to worry about and fear besides the temperature. Have a little sympathy over here. Whatever happened to predictability of seasons? Being predictable isn't all that bad, you know. Don't listen to anyone who says otherwise at this instant. Just let me know, I know a couple of people that will fight them over it.

Y'all should see my hair. That is probably the most hilarious part out of everything. You remember that scene in the Lion King where Simba jumps in the water and then shakes out and his hair is bigger than anything naturally is in the jungle? Yeah, think that plus Weird Al and you may be on the right track to understanding whatever this is on top of my head. I've been trying to tame it with frizz spray, hair dryers, straighteners, hairspray, and anything else I can get my grubby little paws on, and so far, I look only mildly scary.

So..... win?