Driving in downtown traffic almost took me to Illinois. *insert eyeroll here*

Yesterday afternoon I had an appointment downtown and what should have been a relatively easy process, was the exact opposite. In fact, it was almost as much of a clusterf*ck as one of my regular "I'm not at work" outfits.

Let's not even talk about the fact that what should have been a ten minute drive there ended up taking thirty-five minutes and a twenty-five minute drive back (adding an additional fifteen minutes for "rush" traffic) ended up being an hour and ten minutes. And I'm pretty sure it gave me more gray hair.

I should probably start at the beginning. Full disclosure: I am horrible with directions. Legitimately, HORRIBLE. You could give me a compass and a detailed map and I would STILL find a way to get lost. You think with how many times I've watched The Goonies I would be better at this, but nope.

And yeah, it's an incredibly important life skill, BUT I haven't caught on. I am the true epitome of having "no sense of direction."

But with this appointment I knew I would be fine, because not only had I been directly in front of the building, but literally all I had to do was drive straight down the road and make ONE right turn. That's it.

Did I have it planned in my head exactly like that? YES. Is that how it ended up working out in the long run of things? ABSOLUTELY F*CKING NOT. You see, there is always construction downtown. ALWAYS. Truthfully, I think it's a legitimate city rule and nobody that actually drives in it or has to deal with it gets a vote. And we've all kind of learned to accept that. Sure, it annoys us and we cuss about it, but we deal.

What I was unaware of however is the fact that three times the amount of construction is happening downtown at this point and every single one of the two-way roads are for the time being, one way  roads. Meaning that you have to drive in about two and a half (so.... two full circles and a kind of half moon?) circles to get to anywhere if you're trying to turn. You literally just have to keep going round and round until you get to where you're going.

Also, when you're trying to go somewhere and you get on the wrong road, you can't turn around forever and you basically just have to let the road take you where it's going until you can luck out and find ANYWHERE to pull into and turn around on the opposite road. It's a legitimate nightmare.

Oh, and it cost me $18 to park. F*cking downtown.