“It’s not the length of time we knew someone that makes them so special. It’s what they brought into our lives.” –Sandra Kring

This past week (10/12-10/18), D and I made a trip to Florida to help out with and attend my FIL's (Dennis) Celebration of Life. The week was full of tears, laughs, love, understanding, questioning, and acceptance. 

Dennis was an amazing guy. The kind of man that didn't show up out of the blue too often. He was as firm as he was caring and once he had his mind set there was no turning him back. He stood true to his convictions and never faltered when it came to understanding and loving his family.

I've never met a man in all my life that was as stubborn and accepting as him. I know that makes absolutely no sense, but that's really the only way to describe him. When he had a thought or belief he held true to that but he was also able to see other peoples sides and accept that. Didn't mean he changed his mind or agreed with you at all. In fact, he'd argue with you until he was blue in the face and you were so exasperated you wanted to jump off a bridge. However, he was able to accept that people were going to live their lives how they saw fit and there was nothing he could do except offer advice, knowledge, and love.

And trust me when I tell you the man had more love to offer than any of us knew what to do with. 

I was very fortunate when I married D. I had heard horror stories my entire life about people and their in-laws never getting along. Some of the things people would tell me sounded completely unbelievable.

I knew I would never have issue with my MIL, because I love the woman like a second mother. I've known her since I was fifteen years old and she has always treated me as one of her own. Momma and her were good friends and I feel a peace and calm surrounded by love when I'm around her. No one could ever replace Momma in my mind or heart, but she has a way of showing me motherly love without trying to take the place of. She's honestly just amazing like that. 

However, when we got together I had only met his dad once (briefly when we were teens) and had never met his stepdad. I was nervous... but I didn't need to be. I have a unique relationship with each of his parents. Not unique in a bad way, but actually, quite the opposite. I'm completely comfortable and myself around them all the time. I never feel the need to hide myself or have fear that I'll say the wrong thing. His family has always just accepted who I am as a person and we've rolled with it. 

That was never more true than with Dennis. His big personality sucked you right in and he was your friend before you even knew what hit you. While expecting not to have much of a relationship with either of my FIL's, I found myself pleasantly surprised to realize that they weren't just "in-laws" they were family. My family. 

And my family is devastated over this loss.

It may sound cliché, but this is a loss that not only had we never seen coming, but also completely annihilated us. It rocked everyone of us to our core and we all feel it. No one more so than his wife and children. Because D and his siblings were never "stepchildren" to Dennis. He treated, thought of, and loved them like they were his own. And he did the same with all of us that happened to marry his children. 

My MIL lost her husband, best friend and love of her life and we all lost a father.

This past week was about celebrating his life and starting to heal as a family. People came from all over the country to say their goodbyes or share their memories and to say that our family is humbled by the outpouring of love and support that has been shown to us throughout this time, would be an understatement.

It's been hard and it's going to continue to be hard. Learning that this is your new normal after such a big loss is an overwhelming feeling. But we'll continue to go on together, and I know he'll always be hanging around watching out for us and rolling his eyes at the fact that us "kids" can't seem to keep our shit together.

We miss you, Papi. We love and adore the shit out of you and there's a giant hole in our lives now that you're no longer here. We'll continue to take care of each other and we'll keep a special eye on your honey bunny. Thank you for being the dad we all needed when we didn't even know it.

P.s... I know when we were talking to Trish on the porch this last week the only thing you could do was throw up your hands and holler "YOU KIDS ARE KILLING ME!" But, we tease out of love.

Two years with my forever Gatorbaby. ❤️🧡

It sometimes blows my mind that I've been married for two years. I tell my husband constantly that our lives together feel like forever and right now all at once. We've known each other since we were fifteen years old, but somehow, it also feels like things are brand new.

I wouldn't even know where to begin with describing the level of love and adoration I hold for that 6'3 man of mine. He's as loving as he is thoughtful and as caring as he is kind. When the man hugs me I honestly feel safe and like everything is going to be ok. He is my peace and my calm. My best friend and partner in crime. 

We do nothing without each other and when someone tells me I can't have only my husband as my bestie, I tell them to piss off. 

We get bigger together, smaller together, hell, we even get matching pimples. My BIL likes to say we're so damn adorable with each other that it's damn near disgusting. And I love that. I love that when people think of us they think of us as how we are with each other.

He's my comfort and my love. Basically, he's everything good that I have to offer the world. 

Happy Anniversary, my love. We may not be spending it like we thought we might (when do our plans ever really work out?), and we may be in a different state, but as long as I'm with you, I know we got this. You're my rock, my calm, my happiness, and the love of my life.

Here's to two and many more.

P.s... I'm gonna try to talk you into watching a scary movie and giving me some cuddles as soon as the first opportunity presents itself. You just don't know it yet. Actually, you probably do, because you know me well.

I know it died out in 1353 but... I don't know. It's shady is all I'm saying.

Dude, you would not believe the damn weekend that D and I had. 

By the time he got home from work on Friday he was so damn sick he could barely stand and had a 102° temperature. By the time I got home (about an hour after him) he was showered and in the bed curled up. I took his temp and immediately went to the store to get drinks and meds. The poor guy was miserable and I felt terrible for him. He hardly ever gets sick, so when he does, he's usually down for the count.

...Cut to Saturday evening and I started feeling like shit... followed by waking up at one o'clock in the morning thinking this is the end and having a 101.8° temp. Between the two of us we had every ill symptom you could think of... cold sweats, fever, shivers, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, body aches, fatigue. I'll tell you one thing, this flu was not fucking around but we sure as shit found out. I thought I was going to have to at least get D in the doctor at a couple points.

We mostly just stayed in bed all day Saturday and Sunday watching movies and taking meds, because we didn't have the strength to do anything else. Our pups sure loved being able to hold us down and make sure we couldn't go anywhere though. We watched some movie about the Black Plague and honestly, I thought way too long about the fact that may be what we had. I blame NyQuil.

D had to call out of work this morning, because his fever still hadn't broke completely. I managed to come into work, but I sure as shit can tell I'm running on fumes. We're both feeling better(ish), but we're drained and so damn sore.

Oh, and did I mention we're supposed to leave tomorrow evening to head down to FL so we can spend time with my MIL and help out with my FIL's Celebration of Life?

Essentially, nothing we had planned in order to prepare for our trip got accomplished. And our house is a disaster. Kind of smells like sickness in there too. I have to wash everything and Lysol/bleach the rest. I'll get to it... maybe. If I can find the strength. In other words, this all should be very interesting.

And a picture of Tayder... just because (and yes, he has a bald spot on his butt... mind your own business).

Two things that deserve their own thing but nope.

Two things happened recently that I never had the chance to mention, but felt the need to share something right quick.

#1: My little baby Solae got married. Well, she got married a couple months ago, but they had a wedding. All the pictures that were taken were by their photographer and my brother took one of me and my SIL. Other than that, I got nothing. 

#2: D and I took a road trip with his cousin, Travis, to visit his mom up on the Ohio/Michigan border. It was about a 3.5 hour drive (one way) and it was real nice. I had never been that far North, so it was new to me and I have to say, we all had fun.

That's it, that's all I got. I want to tell people more about both things, but honestly, I don't have the energy right now, so instead, I offer two pictures in the place of words.