Winter is coming. *time for the Midwest to do its questionable thing*

Here it is, the middle end of September and we're all standing here like ?!!?!!!!?!?!! In other words, we're all very confused.

I don't want to be one of "those people" that "totally can't believe we're already nine months in" and wondering "where did the year go?!" and all that jazz, but let's be honest.

THAT'S EXACTLY WHERE I'M AT WITH IT.

Y'all, I seriously don't know where this year has went and so many things have happened and haven't happened and are going to happen that I'm basically just a nervous bundle of anxiety over here. And don't get me wrong, I'm literally ALWAYS a nervous bundle of anxiety, BUT now I'm also confused, because WHERE DID THIS YEAR GO?!!?!

I am not alone in this feeling. I was just coming to terms with the fact that I turned twenty-eight in February and AND NOW twenty-nine is creeping up on me faster than a pair of pantyhose in a Alabama church come August. In case you're not from the South and don't understand that reference, let me just tell you, THAT'S F*CKING FAST.

Am I seriously about to be spending my last year in my twenties ever? Don't get me wrong, I don't mind that I'm getting older (I'm finally aging into my bitter old lady personality), but it just feels very weird.

It's been raining/storming on/off here for four days(?) now and the upside of this is #1: I love thunderstorms and #2: I haven't had to mow grass.... yet. Don't you worry though, that time is coming, friends. Luckily, I've gotten the majority of our stuff cut down/packed up/all that jazz for winter, so really it's just a whole lot of mowing and weed-eating. And apparently planting "fall" flowers and plants, because that's our thing now?

The season of hoodies, sweatpants, boots (even though that's a year round thing for me!), hot cider, chicken and dumplings, no yard work, cuddling with your pups (again, an all year round thing!), and avoiding people by staying in your house and only coming out when you absolutely have to is almost upon us. Of course, with that season also comes snow shoveling, freezing rain, and gloom (which I love, but apparently other people despise?).... but that's neither here nor there.

Work has been.... exhausting?! *Jack Torrance would laugh with us* 🔪😬

Where do I even begin? Well, for starters.... no pups were made bedless by the taking of this picture (it needed said).

I think we can all agree that when we were younger, we thought being an adult was going to be a lot more fun than it really is.

Sure, we stay up as late as we want, have cereal for dinner to the point of no one can stop us, and buy alcohol.... but they left out the part that says coming with all of that is the fact that you're trying to run on six hours of sleep a week, you have to deal with a myriad of things when you don't necessarily eat healthy (although, my body is so used to my ridiculous diet it would probably fall over dead if I tried to change it at this point), and hangovers become increasingly more difficult after the age of twenty-two five.

With all of that being said, I'm going to lead with I got a "promotion" at work (as in, we're doing even more stuff, but I still have the same title that I'm also pretty sure isn't a thing and we made up on the fly one day, because I needed a "title" for my email signature) and a raise (I'm currently singing Snoop Dogg in my head). Along with that came with all the other things that come with being an adult.... more responsibility.

Where was the "be a gummy bear taste tester" line when I had to go to the job fairs in school?!

In order to deal with this ever increasing fluctuation of "what the f*ck" moments between Dani and I, we try to have a positive outlook (said no one about our personalities EVER) and get in "laughs" and "lighthearted" moments whenever we can. And yes, we also have those days where we listen to The Shining via audiobook, but THAT'S NOT THE POINT. Including, but not limited to crawling into her pup Gibson's brand new dog bed to see if we can in fact fit (spoiler alert: we can).

There are numerous advantages to being 54.... just ask any 84 year old. ❤️

Today is my Momma's 54th (but if anybody asks, 25th) birthday. I'm so happy that I get to see her on this day and every single day (and I wouldn't have it any other way!), because a little over a year ago I didn't know if we would ever spend another birthday together. 

She's come a long way and her strength and perseverance is something that I marvel at daily. She truly is one of the strongest people that I have ever known and I'm very proud to call myself her daughter. 

We still have a long road ahead, and lord knows I'm sure it will be rocky to say the least, but lucky for us, that seems to be our specialty. You know, where we tend to be the majority of life.

And while she always insists that no one make a "big deal" when it comes to her birthday, I make it a point to let her know how special she is to me every day. And whether she likes it or not, people want to celebrate this day with her (and all the other days, as well), because she really is just that great of a person and that special to everyone that loves her.

I couldn't be any luckier in the "Mom Department" if they tried. She is, hands down, the best mother, friend, and woman that I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. I love you more than you'll ever know, Momma. You're my best friend, mother, confidant, biggest fan (and I yours), and most importantly, my heart. (And the epitome of a bee charmer.)

So, here's to you, Momma. It's your party.... and you can cry drink nap party do what you want to. I love you.

🐶 Tayder's big-little brother (Spart) is not-so-slowly outgrowing me. 🐶

Back when we adopted Spart, I was used to having one small older pup (my forever love- Tayder) in our lives.... and then we apparently wanted to delve into a shitshow and find out how crazy we could become before reaching our breaking point.

Enter Spart. The world's cuddliest huge dog that feels like he's definitely a teeny tiny lap dog, even if only in heart (and his brain).

He's clumsy and insane, thinks he's the size of a chihuahua, and has a set of jowls that would rival any hog that I've ever seen.... and I grew up surrounded by farmland, people!

But, with all of his crazy (and there's SO much of it to go around), he's also lovable, sweet, goofy, cuddly (and by cuddly, I mean he likes to just throw his butt and fall onto me full body weight), snorty (yes, he snorts and I love it!), and loves us and his little-big brother like nobody's business.

For everything the pup has been through, and he has been through some terribly awful shit, he has managed to retain his innocence and lovability better than I have seen almost anybody be able to do.

And don't let Tayder fool you. He may pretend like he's not a fan of his big-little brother, but for every snip he lets out and eyeroll he lets go, he also let's him "hide" behind him when he's scared (even though Spart is WAY bigger than him), pretends like he needs to go outside so Spart doesn't have to be in his crate (something he mostly only sleeps in at this point), and makes sure he eats/drinks before he himself does.

To say he's definitely a member of our family, and one of the greatest loves around, would be an understatement on the part of ALL of us.... and I will never know how anyone could have ever mistreated such a lovable goof. That definitely says more about them as a person than him as a pup. And by "as a person" I mean they're a bag of dicks and deserve to be hit with a bus.

To say that I've been slacking would be an understatement. *exasperation*

Y'all, it's been so long since I've wrote anything down. Well.... anything aside from grocery lists and sixteen thousand notebooks full of work stuff. (shoot. me. now. oomph.)

Being an adult is hard.

With that being said, I couldn't tell you how many times I've opened my blogger on a spare tab and attempted to write something down. Basically, just anything down. I now live by the term "the struggle is real" and that's probably what's going to have to be written on my tombstone.

I'm going to try and catch up.... at least, hit some things that I may elaborate on later on down the road.

-Thanks to Danielle, I learned that I've been using a can opener wrong my entire life.
A couple of weeks back, Danielle watched a video on FB (isn't that where most evil things start these days?) of Djswauvea (no, I don't know if that's his legit name or just a youtube name) reacting to finding out that he had been using a can opener wrong his entire life. Thinking that this was one of those "you can't believe everything on the internet, especially FB" moments, I gave it a go.... and apparently, I've just been using one wrong for twenty-eight years. You wouldn't believe how irrationally angry it made me (and Danielle by extension, because OF COURSE I had to text her immediately afterwards). Sometimes it really is the little things.

-I went and seen my amazing "lady doctor" last week and we're trying something new (Kyleena.... to be continued).
I've had a love/hate relationship with my "lady doctor" for around four (five?) years now. You know what, let me correct that.... I've had a love/hate relationship with my "lady bits" for around four (five?) years now, but I LOVE my "lady doctor." She is quite literally the best. Around four (five?) years ago, I gained a significant amount of weight and felt HORRIBLE at all times. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me, but assumed that it might have something to do with my "lady bits" because I had a Mirena and it was almost time to have it removed (I've heard they can cause weird side effects when it's almost time to have it removed as your body's way of reminding you). Come to find out, it was my "lady bits" that were the problem, but not my IUD. Long story short, I've struggled with it and everything surrounding it since. But, after four (five?) years of being on the pill (for hormonal reasons), my "lady doctor" told me she thought it would be best to try out Kyleena, as it's designed with women who've never had children in mind. She thinks it will really help some of my issues and since I trust her and her opinion she put the order in and I go back to have it placed once her office receives it.

-It rained for four days straight.... and now it's officially "that time" of year.
Ah, it's officially "that time" of the year.... the time where you have the heat (defroster) on on the way to work, the AC cranked on the way home at the end of the day, storms and rain are always in the forecast, and you've taken so many allergy meds you don't know how to be a functional adult (please, like I've ever known that). Welcome to the Midwest!! (Also, I take allergy meds around the clock/year, so this part is not an adjustment for me). PS: my grass desperately needs mowed and I'm like eh.

-You can officially say that I've watched an entire season of American Horror Story.
Last year in September/October I started watching the third season of American Horror Story.... one of my favorite parts of that show is the fact that each season is a different subject than all the others, but they all seem to still meld together. I decided to start with Coven, because as most people know, I love all things witches (you can blame the Sanderson sisters and the fact that I want to go to Salem). With the move and my short attention span, I never finished.... UNTIL NOW. Once it was done, I went back and started season one.

-And five whole seasons of Shameless.
My cousin, J, told me I needed to check out the show and since it has been on my Netflix queue for months I decided that I should give it a go. I more or less loved and binge-watched the first five seasons, but have lost steam since my favorite character (Mickey Milkovich) is no longer on there. Oh, and since Momma officially hates it, because both of her favorites (Sheila and Jimmy/Steve/Jack) are gone. I want to continue with it, but whether or not I get to is to be determined.

-Spart won't quit growing like he's a damn weed.
It's been a long while since we've had a big dog. Tayder is my little guy and has been with me for YEARS, but he was the first "little" dog that I've ever personally had. We always had bigger dogs, but got pretty used to it just being my little man. Then Spart joined the family and even though he was pretty puny when we brought him home, he is a GIANT now. That doesn't stop him from thinking he's a lapdog and trying to hide behind Tayder when he's scared though. (Side note: Happy International Dog Day!! Did y'all know that was thing? If not, you do now!)

-Tayder still isn't 100% onboard with having a baby brother.... but he's adjusting.
Speaking of my little buddy and Spart.... remember how I said Tayder has been with me for years? Well, after Momma's pup, Dixie, passed away, it's been only Tayder. He got pretty accustomed to being in a one dog household and having a giant little brother has been quite the adjustment for everyone. He's probably still not real happy about it, but he's used to him at this point.

-We got new windows put in our house in the living room and kitchen.
When we moved into our house last year, we knew that there were going to be things we needed to get done. It's an older house and while it was pretty decent, it's not brand new. Lucky for us, I don't mind having to put in some work and it's really exciting to have our own house (again!) and knowing that we can do it anyway that we want, because we're never moving again (because I'm tired of f*cking moving and plan to just die there now). While I do know how to do quite a few things when it comes to remodeling/fixing things/building a house (we literally built my childhood home from the giant ass open field up and I help Uncle D with everything from installing countertops to fire pit building), there are certain things I think pros should do. Windows are one of those things. We couldn't afford to have them all replaced, but the only ones that needed it "right now" were the ones in the living room and kitchen, because they leaked HORRIBLY. Now that they're replaced, you can 100% tell the difference even within the AC itself.

-Got Hulu back (and kept Netflix).
I love Netflix. The fact that I can binge-watch to my little heart's content is no secret (even though I don't always get to). We tried out Hulu last year, but decided we should probably cut at least one of them out. I was pretty sad that Netflix had removed It's Always Sunny, but real happy to know Hulu now offers it. So, we got Hulu back. And they have some pretty good stuff.

-Had to deal with the entire world and their "Kiki Challenges."
I know y'all have see these "Kiki Challenges" and I want to punch Drake in his face for it. While I think it's completely stupid for someone to jump out of their moving vehicle to dance (y'all, I locked my keys in my parked, but running car once and felt like a giant dumbass then), and record it (why would you want evidence of you doing something illegal and/or dangerous to everyone in your vicinity), I have so say.... the "Kiki Challenge Fails" are what I'm here for.

-Prepared a bunch of green tomatoes for freezing for winter.... then lost them all.
Fried Green Tomatoes isn't just a fabulous movie.... it's also a delicious meal within itself. If being raised in the sticks doesn't teach you that it's perfectly acceptable to deep fry all of your veggies for consumption, then nothing ever will. Our tomato plants went insane this year and while they're gone now, they left us with quite a few green tomatoes to freeze for consumption in the winter. So, I spent three hours one day preparing them all and freezing them.... and then our freezer wet out. *eye roll*

-Watched my big brother turn 32 years old.
My brother love to tell me that I'm "creeping up on thirty" and gets real offended when I counter with "yeah, but once I'm there, you'll be in your mid-thirties." His birthday is in July and we was the big 3-2 this year. His last few birthdays have been real special to him now that he's a father. We fight and argue constantly and have for our entire lives, but it's so surreal to me that he's so grown up. Big brother or not, he'll always be a scrawny little kid to me.

-My hair is dark brown.... again.
I've been talking about making a "drastic" change to my hair for a couple of years now. I debated on whether or not to chop it all off and I even started using Sun-In to enhance the natural blonde in my hair (which is apparently alot), and swore that I was done dying it, because I didn't want to deal with it anymore. Well.... then I decided that I wanted my dark brown hair back. Call it the forever fifteen year old girl in me, but I just prefer my dark hair. And if I have to get it from a bottle, so be it. I guess that's what I get for dying it starting at twelve years old.

-I repainted our bathroom and now I'm almost 100% sure they should give me my own show on HGTV.
Eventually, I would like to redo our bathroom and take out the tub and install a walk-in shower (I hate taking baths, but LOVE taking showers), but until that day comes (which will probably be years from now), we gotta make the most of what we've got. For some reason the people we bought the house from had painted the bathroom a really dark brown/grey color, put in a giant dark brown mirror, and a wood vanity. Nothing matched and with the navy blue tiles that takes up half of the whole room, it looked pretty wonky. This past weekend I painted it white, put on new hinges, put up a medicine cabinet instead of plain mirror, and when I get home today I have to clean and do touch-ups. You wouldn't believe how much better it already looks.

I started using Sun-In.... even though I read a million scary reviews. *gasps*

First things first.... I used to dye my hair black every chance I got. And I'm not talking a little darker than my natural color. I'm talking full on jet black for YEARS. Sure, with my pale skin it made me look borderline Morticia Addams (and also, like I was maybe a sick person?), but I LOVED it and would probably still do it if my hair would hold any form of color. But it won't (probably from the fact that I consistently dyed it from the age of twelve through twenty-two without missing a beat).

So, here I am living my mousey natural hair color existence.

And you know, I never quite realized how much blonde my hair naturally had in it (again, because I hadn't seen my natural color since I was twelve), but here we are.

I figured that if I was going to have light hair for the rest of my life, I might as well have it a sandy blonde.... right?! The best way I could figure out how to do that (again, without dye/bleach, etc.) was to try Sun-In.

I've been thinking about trying this product since I was a young teen and my friend Amanda used it religiously (even though her natural hair color is already kind of a light bleach blonde?), but never did.

For years I had forgotten about it even existing, and honestly figured they had quit making it years ago, because as I said I remember it from when I was super young! But, then I saw it on the shelf at the store one day and decided to give it a go.

Before I did anything that "drastic" though, I decided to read up on some of the reviews and to say that there were a million "bad/questionable" reviews would be an understatement. Sure, there were a couple of good ones out there, but the bad almost had me running for the hills, clutching my hair with both hands like Buffalo Bill was chasing after me. And then I read a review from xoJane and she was honest in saying that it did dry her hair out/give her split ends, but that she got the color she wanted and was relatively pleased with her results (you can always use a shit ton of conditioner, hot oil, hair masks, leave in conditioner, etc. to help with the drying out!), so I thought what I usually think in situations where it could either go ok or end up in utter disaster....

WHAT THE HELL. LET'S DO THIS.

This past Friday when Momma and I ran errands and stopped into the grocery store (aka, Walmart) I picked up a bottle of Sun-In (in the pink bottle- tropical breeze?) and so far I've used it twice. I also picked up a bottle of leave-in conditioner and a "hair treatment" (that I hate and am going to find something different), because of all the "dries your hair out" reviews out there. I didn't really notice that my hair was dryer, but once I re-washed it I did notice it was harder to brush out. I haven't noticed an overall difference in the color, but I have noticed there are a few spots that are really coming through blonder (since I have a lot of blonde in my hair to begin with).

But, like I said, I've only used it twice (and gave my hair a rest/treatment last night), so I'm sure I'll notice more soon.

And on a side note: I decided recently that it may be a good idea to "work out" my body a little bit, not for any purpose other than just to feel better, and I would like to go on the record of saying that my legs hurt SO F*CKING BAD. Seriously, it's only my thighs, but I feel like I may in fact kill over at any given moment. Can that happen?!

I can't find words and I need a very LARGE drink. *come on weekend* 🥃

It's that time of year where we all forget how freezing and miserable we were during the winter months and start complaining about the sweltering heat, because we just can't be pleased.

Personally, I prefer the winter, because I would rather put on an extra layer as opposed to sweating balls off that I don't even have. If I'm being perfectly honest, I would rather stay in the house 24/7 regardless of the season, but that's just me.

This day has been so stupid. And I say "day" but really it's been more like the week in general? Literally by Tuesday I was like, "THIS IS STUPID" and wanted to throw a mini temper tantrum that would make a three year old blush.

Mostly, my constant complaints and general annoyance can all be traced back to one thing....

WORK.... and you know, being a adult.

And not "work" in the "general sense", but "work" in the "NOTHING IS GOING RIGHT AND NO ONE WILL LISTEN" sense. You ever have those days? We're currently having one of those days.... for the past two weeks.

Oh, and my insomnia has decided to kick it's shit into high gear, because apparently sleep is for nice people that don't have a sarcastic sense of humor. Seriously, I don't know what's happening up in my head, but I've literally been replaying scenarios in my head for the past decade and honestly, I JUST WANT A NAP.... and in the interest of full disclosure, a really large beer.

Sure, all of this won't last forever (probably?), but there's no telling how long it will stick around. Even our email is broken.... just like our spirit. Ugh.... I'll stop complaining eventually.... maybe. You know what, I wouldn't count on it anytime soon.

A beaver attacked my car while I was driving it. And no, that's not a euphemism for anything. *insert exasperation here* 🤨

This past week has been full of buillshit and "what the f*ck" moments, so I thought I would share a story that's even more bizarre than that for "Throwback Thursday." Except it's really not, because who in the hell gets attacked by a beaver while driving to the grocery store other than me?!

You know what, don't answer that. Moving on.

When I was about seventeen years old, a friend of ours (and I use the term "friend" lightly, because it's easier to say than "dude I couldn't hardly stand as we got older, because he became a real bag of d*cks" but whatever), wrecked his truck and tried to get away with the ultimate.

And it wasn't a bad wreck or anything like that, he basically just drove his big ass jacked-up diesel off a back road and hit a fence post. I don't think it even really did much past the point of scratching his bumper and barely denting his grill. The point is, he didn't get hurt and his truck was fine.

BUT he took this opportunity to do the ultimate.... he used it to call off his engagement (with his wedding weeks away).

BY FAKING AMNESIA. Apparently, his girlfriend had taken it upon herself to not only propose to herself for him, buy her own engagement ring (using his debit card that she swiped from his wallet), and plan the entire wedding and he literally just didn't even know how to get out of it. We all kind of wondered why he didn't just say something like, "look sweetie.... YOU'RE A F*CKING PSYCHO AND I'M NOT MARRYING YOU" but honestly, we all wanted to see the shit show play out.

Oh, and did it ever play out. It "played out" in the form of, he pretended to have amnesia.... but only when it came to her. So basically, he was fine and normal except he couldn't remember "her", the fact that he "loved her" or anything about their entire relationship. And we all sat there in disbelief waiting for her to call his punkass out for his bullshit and SHE NEVER DID.

She not only believed him and the entire story that he was spinning (with all of us rolling our eyes and being like "oh sweetie.... bless your heart"), BUT his plan hilariously backfired when she didn't let the fact that he forgot her and their "life" together drive her away, but instead decided to make him "fall in love with her all over again" and make sure it was "better and stronger than before." For weeks she reminded him with pictures and songs and by the time the wedding rolled around, she knew it was meant to be again.

Oh shit, did I forget to mention that part? My bad.... yeah, she totally never even called the wedding off. She did however change everything that he had originally said he wanted and told him it was because "he didn't really want it that way before his accident." And he couldn't dispute it, because then he would've had to come clean about the whole "amnesia" thing. (Which he did come clean to everybody else about seeking advice on how to get out, but once again, we had nothing useful to offer him).

You'll be happy to know that they just celebrated their ten year anniversary a couple of weeks ago and have two kids.... and she still tells the story about how they "almost lost each other" but through perseverance and love they "found each other and fell in love all over again."

And no, I didn't make this shit up. But, we all love to tell this ridiculous (and sadly, true) story.... he doesn't think it's funny.

In the words of Michael Kelso: *BURN* And also, *BUUURRRNNN* 🔥

Dude, I know that I should be one of those people that thinks you should let bygones be bygones and such.... but I'm not.

Look, I know that people make mistakes. And I truly understand that, we've all been there. Lord knows I'm not perfect and have never claimed to be, because it would be lying. I've made mistakes and I've done things I'm not proud of in my life (hopefully I'm not a horrible person, because I'm alone in this).

I think we've all been there at some point.

BUT, I have never set out to intentionally hurt someone- physically or mentally.

Except my brother, and that was self defense, because growing up with him was like being raised somewhere between backyard wrestling, boot camp, the middle part of Bravehart, and the battle of Helm's Deep.

With that being said, I can also completely understand the need for "revenge" of sorts. Especially when that "revenge" doesn't necessarily hurt someone, but helps you recover something in your own way.

A man in Minnesota, who was raised alongside of his sister by their grandmother, wrote an obituary for his biological mother. And he used that moment to get out some of the things that he had apparently been holding in for many years.

Now, I understand that ole saying, "you shouldn't speak ill of the dead" and my Grammy was a stickler for that one.... however, she also used to say that when someone treats you poorly, it's in your right to let someone know that. As someone who has been in the position of the one being hurt, I can sympathize with it. Did this obituary hurt someone who read it? Possibly. But isn't it perfectly reasonable that he has the right to say how he and his sister feel?

Maybe I'm wrong, but I think he does. And maybe the way he did it was tacky (I don't necessarily think so, but I know many people do), but then again, maybe that's exactly what he needed to do for he and his sister. We all get closure in different ways and maybe this was his. Personally, I don't think we all need "closure" I think we can come to it ourselves, and sometimes we don't even feel the need for it in the first place, because we literally don't even give two shits, but some people need a little help.

And I'm glad this dude got it.

I've just accepted my "chubbiness" at this point in my life. *all the tacos*

Until the age of about twenty-two I was damn skinny (and flat chested). And when I say "damn skinny" I mean it.... my pants were a size 00. and small shirts were way big on me. (I never got over 102 pounds).

And then, when I was twenty-three, some things happened with my health (ie: hormones and "lady bits") and it caused a variety of fun things like adult acne, early onset hot flashes, nausea.... and rapid weight gain. Like, we're talking sixty pounds in about three-four months. It was insane and I had no clue what was happening with my mind or body.

I just couldn't seem to get it under control. Any of it. I tried every acne product that was offered.... nothing. I tried wearing tanks and shorts even when it was cold.... nothing. I wasn't eating hardly anything and yet.... nothing. See a pattern here?! NOTHING.

Hilaria Baldwin was (and is) literally smaller than me when she was eight months pregnant.

Then I found a wonderful doctor that actually listened to me. She ran some tests and figured out what was happening. And over the last five years, she's helped me so damn much. Sure, I have scars from where my acne got so bad and even still get it on occasion, but it's much more controlled now. My hot flashes while inconvenient are easier to handle.

And my weight? Well, we have a love/hate relationship. I've lost quite a bit of it (around thirty pounds), but there's just some of it that doesn't want to come off for love nor money. And you know what? I'm ok with that. I'm good with the fact that I'm not the same weight/built like I was when I was eighteen years old. I'm a full grown ass woman pushing thirty (but seriously, don't bring up that whole "thirty" thing too much) and the fact that I'm considered "chubby" doesn't bother me anymore.

Sure, it did to begin with. I felt embarrassed and missed the fact that I used to be so tiny.... and then I got the hell over it and realized that if I let myself, I'm just as happy now as I was then. No.... I'm actually happier.

If you're struggling with something like this, I say just embrace it. Because once you do, you will be amazed at how much better you feel, how much happier you are, and how awesome it is to never say no to tacos and feel good about it.

Also, flowy "hippie" shirts and baggy pants are back in style and I AM HERE FOR IT. Embrace that shit.

I might actually be getting my face back.... that sounded creepy. 🤓🤓🤓

The day after tomorrow I have an eye appointment and I'm looking into.... contacts. Maybe... jury's still deliberating and such.

You see, I don't have good eyesight. In fact, calling it "poor eyesight" as my doctor says is "putting it easy." Essentially, my eyeballs suck and don't want to do their f*cking job. Apparently they're so "blue" that they're almost "translucent" and that's why I can't stand bright lights. I repeat, my eyeballs can't stand bright light, because they're "defective."

What. the. f*ck.... why won't you eyeball, eyeballs?!!?!

Moving on.... back in February 2017 I finally sucked it up and went to get glasses, because I was driving regularly, and lord knows I watch too much tv (#noregrets), and basically it got to where I couldn't even do my work right, because I couldn't see it and ugh being an adult is hard.

I had to get giant framed glasses, because I've tried to get used to wearing small frames before and it never works out for me. That's why I've never stuck with my glasses (that I've needed since I was probably around fifteen?), because I just kept staring at the frames and couldn't break the habit and get used to them. And of course, I would rather see than look decent, so I was all #1: I'm getting these big f*cking glasses so I can function and #2: I don't need contacts, I'll just wear glasses all the time, it makes more sense.

Apparently I didn't think that through all the way. It's not so much about the way they look (we've even had our good days in the look department together), but sometimes they're just terribly inconvenient. And I feel like contacts would be a nice thing to have around. And I could even maybe wear my eye makeup again (but I wouldn't count on it, because lazy).

Don't get me wrong, I'll still have my glasses to fall back on (with my allergies it would be dumb not to make sure I had another option in case my eyes are screwy from pollen and such), but for the most part I would like to see my face again. Although, it will be weird to get used to, because I've literally had it partially covered for over a year (a year and four months?) now.

Wish me luck. Not for the touching my eyeball part, because that doesn't bother me AT ALL, but for the price part. Because trying to see, because your eyeballs won't work right is frustrating.... and expensive.

🐶 Tayder has a new brother.... and I don't know how we feel about it?! 🐶

Yesterday (6/3), Tayder got a new little brother.... that's already taller than him. And it's a working progress.

Momma has been saying for a while that she wanted to get another dog. She wanted a puppy that we could raise up and train and she wanted to make sure that he was a bigger breed of dog.

Personally, I didn't want another dog, as I'm perfectly good with just having my Tayderbug. But, she wanted one that will get bigger and she'll feel more secure with a larger dog.

And naturally, I can't tell her no for shit. I swear, that lady can literally talk me into just about any damn thing. Her: "Katie, you wanna move to Antarctica and live off off whale blubber for the rest of our lives? I really want to." Me: "Sure, Momma." And then next thing you know, my bitch ass is moving to Antarctica.

Ever since Momma's emergency surgery last July, every time we have to leave the house, Tayder freaked the hell out. Like, he's got anxiety worse than any person that I've ever seen. And I get it, how could he not have anxiety after an ordeal like that (I know I do), so she also thought that having a "companion" for him would make him feel more at ease when we have to leave.

Since we both left at 6:00 this morning, I guess we're about to find out.

We rescued (I hate saying "rescue" because it's like I should be Batman or something) a pit mix from the Humane Society yesterday and he's not quite five months old yet. The choice was between him and one other little guy (named Pete), but I was pretty nervous about Pete, because of Tayder. I don't mind adopting an older dog (Tayder was older when I got him), but I said we had to make sure that it could be a good match for him.

His name is Sparty (technically Spartacus) and the poor little guy was covered in poo and urine (he wasn't allowed to be out on their grounds, because he's under six months and they've had an issue with parvo in the past) and malnourished. I gave him two baths when we got him home (his tail and paws are still dyed yellow, but they're improving!), gave him a flea treatment and rubbed him down in baby powder (for the smell). Now, we just have to get some weight on him.

He's pretty timid and playful, and as I said, as long as Tayder is ok with it, then there's no problem whatsoever. Also, I had to get him a crate (I've NEVER crated a dog before in my entire life), because the place that had him suggested that it would be a good idea until he's "adapted" more for when we have to leave the house. He actually slept in it last night (he walked into the crate without me even saying anything.... maybe it's a security thing for him right now?) and we let him and Tayder run the yard a bit this morning before I had to leave for work and drop Momma off at Aunt Poot's and then he went back in since we had to leave.

We're not going to be crating him often, but it probably is a good idea for now, at least until we can get his belly under control (poor little guy has diarrhea and I think it's a combination of anxiety and not getting proper "care" before).

You know what I've learned in the last like eighteen hours? I've learned that I had completely forgotten what it was like to have a puppy in the house. It's an entirely different ballgame and I am striking out big time. But, I'm trying, Momma is trying.... and Tayder is helping me out (he shows his support for me with kisses and love).

So, wish us luck on this next adventure of ours. I think we're gonna need it. #AdoptDontShop